my first summer French camp!

And all I have to do is plan five 30-minute immersion classes!

My most loyal readers may remember that while I adore my part-time job coordinating a reading enrichment program at the public library, I've also toyed with the idea of offering French classes for young children.  But with two little kids at home, that's just not possible right now.  (I mean, I can't even sustain a free storytime in French!)

But then last week, while I was waiting in the music center during Griffin's Dalcroze Eurythmics class and chatting with another mom about how I got interested in French, a violin teacher introduced herself and said she was looking for someone to teach French for a half-hour a day for her week-long France-themed Suzuki strings camp for ages 6-10!  ("Celebrate the rich culture of France through music, art, and games," says the camp description.)

And she will pay me!  And I can bring Griffin and Gwyneth along (and thus not spend more in childcare than I would earn)!

So that was an easy decision, n'est-ce pas?

Once they let me know in early June if the class has met its minimum enrollment, I'll start figuring out what to do. I can already tell that 150 minutes won't be nearly enough.....

she might not "toc" much, but she's no "dodo"!

We recently added a new element to Gwyneth's bedtime routine in hopes of convincing her that cribs are for sleeping in, blankets are for cuddling under, and that lullabies lead to slumber.  We each take a baby doll or stuffed animal, cradle it in our arms, and sing the berceuse "Dodo, bebe do, bebe dormira peut-etre/Dodo, bebe do, bebe dormira bientot." (Or rather, I do; my husband invents his own lullabies in English for her.)  Then we tuck the dolls under a blankie and kiss them and stroke their forehead and wish them a bonne nuit.

As you can see from the video, Gwyneth participates sweetly, lovingly, carefully (until she tries to shove the dolly in between the slats of the crib), and she even approximates the lullaby, singing "Dodo, dodo, dodo."  Awwww.

And if you'll indulge me for one other bedtime anecdote?

First, an example of onomatopoeia in French: "toc, toc, toc" is the sound you make for the knock on a door.  (The day that Gwyneth learned how to say this, by the way, was the last time I could count on two minutes of calm in the bathroom: I close the door, she knocks and says "toc, toc, toc" simultaneously, and then she throws the door open.  "Maman here!  Maman here!"  Because, at a year and a half old, you understand that you can announce your presence with a toc but not that you should wait for someone to tell you to entrer.)  Okay, keep that word in mind during the following story:

One of the few English words I regularly use in French with my kids is "tuck" at bedtime, when I'm helping them snuggle tightly under their blankets.  "Tuck-tuck-tuck-tuck-tuck," I'll say as I pull the blanket tight over Griffin.  "Tuck-tuck-tuck-tuck-tuck," as I squeeze Bear and Girafe Chaussette on either side of him.

Yes, I suppose I could say "je te borde dans le lit"--I'm tucking you into your bed--or try a direct translation like "borde-borde-borde-borde-borde," but it doesn't feel right.

For me, each and every "tuck" conveys "good night, sleep tight, I love you, you amazing little creature, and I'm so glad that you're not too big to let me read to you and comfort you and tuck you in at night."

Anyway, I was "tuck-tuck-tuck"ing Gwyneth as usual, and she looked up at me quizzically.  Then she took her tiny fist and rapped it on her chest.  "Toc, toc, toc!"

Awwww.  "Toc" about adorable!

the Carnival is back!

Letizia from Bilingue Per Gioco, founder of the Blogging Carnival on Bilingualism, has passed the torch to Annabelle of the piri-piri lexicon, who is our new fearless leader for a monthly blogging carnival: Raising Multilingual Children.

I didn't get my act together in time to submit a post for this month's carnival, hosted by Coco at Multilingual Mama, but that doesn't mean I won't be rushing over there to be inspired by what the regulars and the new voices have to say about their adventures in bilingual parenting!   I hope to see y'all there....

forums for us

One of the best parts of having a blog is being able to engage with folks around the world who have similar stories and challenges of raising children with more than one language.  But when I don't find the time to write and respond to posts, it's reassuring to visit discussion forums on other websites to ask questions and read advice.

Make yourself a nice cuppa tea and browse some of these!

The inspiring and ambitious Multilingual Living, whose forums include the following:

• Language Disorders
• Bilingual/Immersion Schools
• Sell/Buy/Trade/Wanted Materials
• Language Resources

The newly-founded nnsparents.com (Non-Native Parents), offering topics such as:

• Who told you you can't do this?
• Being a non-native speaking parent
• Baby sign language
• Forums to share vocabulary and tips for specific languages

Multilingual Children's Association, sharing stories and strategies about (among others):

• Non-Native Speakers
• Your Most Burning Questions
• Family Language Systems
• Your Ideas

(This site's forums appear to be losing momentum--most of the posts are from 2012 and earlier.)

Multilingual Family in the UK's discussion forums are divided up by region to help parents find resources (like playgroups) in their area.

The amazing SpanglishBaby invites us to their SpanglishBaby Playground discussion forums (which are only visible to members, so I can't give you an overview until I join them!).

The online bilingual dictionaries site wordreference.com, which boasts--literally--hundreds of thousands of posts in its 4+million threads.  (Each posted question is its own thread, and the site covers many languages.)  I love this site for finding translations and idioms in French, and I especially love it for the forums--native speakers weigh in on how they would say something or what an expression means to them.  I eventually joined so that I could post questions too.  Where else can you find people passionately advocating linguistic accuracy in topics as diverse as:

• Spanish-English Specialized Terminology
• French and English Grammar
• Magyar (Hungarian)
• Cultural Discussions

(It's also entertaining to look up a word, click on one of its related forum topics, then select "Next Forum" or "Previous Forum" to see a random discussion of things you never thought about!  Then click "Next Forum" again and again until an hour later you look up from your computer with glazed eyes and a sense of awe of how complex languages are.)  (Then again, I'm a word nerd.)  (And proud of it!)

Omniglot is also an excellent destination for word nerds; its forums cover languages in general, rather than specific tongues or parenting, like:

• Language Learning
• Endangered Languages and Language Revival
• Writing Systems
• Language-Related Humour

Finally, if you (or your in-laws) are not convinced of the value of raising kids with more than one language, it's worth visiting these three sites with a large readership whose posts about bilingual parenting elicited a lot of forum-like comments:

The parenting advice blog Ask Moxie 
The parenting advice website BabyCenter 
Motherlode, the New York Times' parenting blog

What am I missing?  What about discussion forums in the target language?  Please share your recommendations in the comments!


P.S.  Equally useful (or perhaps more useful, if you don't mind filling up your inbox with Other People's Posts), are these language teaching and parenting listservs you can also sign up for.

noel in septembre

It was like the best "secret Santa" exchange ever, except that we knew what each other's plan was and it was autumn*, not Christmas time!

Last summer, I "met" another Sarah who grew up in Denver, Colorado--not far from where we live--when she emailed me to say that as a longtime reader of my blog and now a permanent resident of Paris (complete with French husband and cute little boy), she would be happy to bring us some books from France during her upcoming trip to Colorado!!!

She even asked what we needed, which meant that we now have lots of nonfiction books in French--I had realized that as Griffin turned from a toddler into a preschooler, his incessant "why"s were getting harder and harder for me to answer in French.  I mean, it's already a challenge to explain cavemen, cavities, and chemistry to a four-year-old in your native language--try doing it in your somewhat rusty French--especially when you've never before had to discuss such topics in French!  (Yeah, for some reason, when I was living in France in my early twenties, it never occurred to me to remind my friends of the importance of brushing their teeth; nor when I was teaching first- and second-year French classes at the university did I ever have to explain why Pluto is no longer considered a planet.)

Note to self: You really need to do more recreational reading in French.  Yes, you.  You know that's the best way to acquire new vocabulary and structures!

Anyway, in September, Sarah brought me a whole suitcase of books for Griffin and Gwyneth, and I am so incredibly grateful.

just a fraction of the bounty from France!

Plus, her gift meant that I have been able to use my library powers for good: as an employee, I can look at the library's discards and donations for our used book sales before they open to the public.  Before Sarah's visit, I went through a roomful of books and picked out ones that I thought would be welcome additions to her son's English language collection back in Paris.

And oh, was that ever fun for me!  I ruled out the classics like Goodnight Moon and Green Eggs and Ham, figuring that it was likely that they had a lot of those already, in favor of picture books that are perhaps less well known but still very, very good.  I bought mostly paperbacks (since she'd have to schlep them all back to France in the suitcase she had emptied for me) storybooks (since her son is a toddler) in good condition (since I had first dibs at the ones for sale), plus some that dealt with elements of American culture (like Thanksgiving and Colorado).

I loved our book exchange, and ever since we met last year, I have continued to collect wonderful books for her little boy!  Now that my son is in preschool, we do the Scholastic Book Club (you know, where you order inexpensive editions of good children's books which are delivered directly to the classroom), and each order we make has a book or two for our new friends in Paris.  Those, plus the used books and CDs that I have been finding and setting aside for them, will hopefully mean that he'll always have a good story in English at his fingertips.

Thank you so very, very much, Sarah!

I heartily encourage the rest of you to set up similar book exchanges to supplement your family's minority language book collection--perhaps through discussion forums on well-established websites like Multilingual Living or newer ones like Non-native Speaking Parents, or via contacts you make on a listserv for parents or teachers?  Please share your ideas here!

*Yes, this wondrous event took place in September 2012, and I'm just now getting around to writing about it in March 2013.

toi qui grandis tous les jours

Yep, his shirt says "Star of Mom's blog."  I bought it in purple so that Gwyneth can wear it in three years too.

Joyeux anniversaire, Griffin, mon amourson.  You're five years old now!  Just look at how grown-up you are:

• You read long books in English and short books in French (and listen to stories in Spanish at your immersion preschool four days a week--and your teacher reports that you're starting to speak Spanish when playing with your classmates!).

our little bibliophiles (a common sight at our house)

• You write thank-you notes, captions for your drawings, and signs for your bedroom door.

"You can't come in here unless you are four or older" (though he adds that Gwyneth and his cousin Ellie can enter "if they are holded up")

• You have a decent command of the simile ("Gwyneth's eyes are like blue olives, Mom, except they're not olives").

and olives aren't blue

• You shovel snow and sweep the kitchen floor and wipe your splatters of pipi off the toilet. (You're welcome, Griffin's Future Girlfriends!).

I just realized that his snow shovel is taller than him.

• You can concentrate on an activity--like your favorite magnetic mosaic game--for over an hour at a time (although, on the other hand, you frequently get distracted when sent to brush your teeth or get dressed, and we find you naked from the waist down, poring over a book on your bedroom floor, or playing with bathtub toys in the sink).

the afore-mentioned magnetic mosaic game, another common sight chez nous

• You love board games and card games, and even play by yourself during "quiet time." (I found you sobbing one afternoon beside the Chutes and Ladders board, holding two game pieces, distraught because "the red guy won!")  And see that book you're reading on your bed in the photo up there?  The book is about chess moves.

This photo has nothing to do with board games.  But you'll understand why I had to include it!

• You can sing in tune and in a round, keep a beat, dance like a rocket, and turn anything into a percussion instrument.

Outdoor summer concert--Griffin climbed up on a speaker directly in front of the singer and started dancing.

• You find such joy in life, from making your baby sister laugh to asking for "honey bubbles" in the bath to zooming your scooter down the sidewalk to eating Pirate Booty with gusto to watching the Broncos with Daddy to playing hide-and-seek.  All. The. Time.  And yet you discover new places to hide!

Yep, he's cute and he knows it.

But you're not so grown-up that you refuse to snuggle or let us read to you or comfort you when you cry.  And you're not always polite or cooperative or tidy (not that those qualities are prerequisites for becoming an adult!).

Griffin displays his well-practiced pout.

It's yet another common sight for us.

The song that's been running through my head for the past couple of months is "Plus tard quand tu seras grand" by Aldebert.  It just wrenches my heart and turns me into a blubbering idiot, because while the song is from the point of view of a little boy who can't wait to grow up and doesn't understand why everyone tells him "you can do X when you're older," given that he grows a little each day.  Impatient--"j'attends les mains sur les hanches"--he feels like he will never be bigger.

But us adults listening to this quiet, eloquent, plaintive, believable song--we know so well that "le temps file a toute allure" and he won't be a little boy much longer.  And as glad as we are to know our little boy is growing up healthy and curious and mischievous and loving, we also know he's growing up into a world where some people do terrible things to other people, and he's going to find out about them, and we won't be able to make him feel better by cuddling or tickling him then.  We can't even guarantee that we'll be there to answer his questions.

But even though this song makes me cry, it also makes me smile.  And if listening to Aldebert sing "Plus tard quand tu seras grand" also makes me want to hug my children and treasure their childhoods, well then, play on.

hey, I'm one of those snobby loser parents!

The worst thing about sending your child to school is that his classmates keep having birthdays, which means that not only are you spending Sunday afternoon celebrating your friends' kids' birthdays, you're now invited to parties for children you barely know, which means lots of small talk with parents you only recognize as so-and-so's mommy.

Griffin with his friends and his birthday waffle at his fifth birthday celebration

This also means that the people you're chatting with don't necessarily know that you're raising your children bilingually.  (Because your kids are off bowling or jumping in the bouncy castle or watching the magician or whacking the piñata, the other guests don't actually hear you speaking French to anyone during the party.)

This, then, leads to an awkward situation that reminds you that not everyone thinks as highly of bilingualism as you and your family and close friends do:

Me: ....early literacy...library...reading...blah blah blah....

Elementary school teacher: ....early literacy...school...reading...blah blah blah....

Me: ....yes, and vocabulary acquisition....blah blah blah

Teacher: ...and what about other languages? Some parents are actually trying to teach their children other languages just 'cause they think it will make them smarter.  Get this: I was at the Erie library and a mom was speaking French to her kids* and one of them bumped into me so the mom apologized to me in English and she had a totally Southern accent which means she's not really French but she speaks it to her family?  Ha, ha!  What a loser!  What a snob!**

Me: Well, in fact, raising your kids bilingually is a true gift to them....blah blah blah....

Teacher: [shrug]

Me, to myself: How is it possible that an elementary school teacher is so dismissive of the idea of choosing to raise children bilingually?

Me, to her: By the way, I'm one of those snobby loser Americans who speaks French to her kids.  Even though we live in northern Colorado.  And guess what: it works!  That little boy over there putting his fingers in his nose and then wiping them on his bowling ball? He's mine.  And he's bilingual.  But not for long: he's learning Spanish in a dual immersion school.  He'll be trilingual.

Teacher, removing pied from bouche: Oh, that's great!  I still don't understand how and why you're doing that, but hey, whatever floats your boat!

Me: And how many languages do your children speak?

Teacher: Just one--English, naturally.

Me: Hmm.  Pity.

Teacher:  I myself speak only one language.

Me: Hmm.  That figures.  Pity.   If you'll excuse me, I see my bilingual boy grabbing his crotch, so I'm going to take him to the toilettes.  Lovely chatting with you--au revoir!

So, does this make me a snob?  (As Miss Piggy once said, "What, pretentious?  Moi?!")  Maybe.  But a loser?  Most definitely not.  My kids are the winners.

mon champion

*I never go to the Erie library, so I can guarantee that she wasn't talking about my family.

**Okay, she didn't actually use those words.  But her tone did!

stumbling through storytime

Gwyneth chooses a chapter book in our newly-renovated library

Regular readers of "Bringing up Baby Bilingual" might have noticed that I haven't mentioned our French storytime at the public library for a loooooong time.  This can be attributed to the following factors:

1.  For quite a few months after Gwyneth's arrival, I lost the ability to carefully plan storytimes in my second language, carry them out, take photos of all the books, find links to all the song lyrics, and then write about them at length.  I was proud of myself simply for reading some stories and singing some songs in French in front of other people!

2.  Two mamans who took turns leading the storytime with me moved away last summer, and another one's work schedule changed.  Lately it's been just moi.  (More work = less blogging!)

3.  The library was closed for nearly two months in fall 2012 for major renovations, and then storytimes didn't start up again right away, so we lost momentum (and I lost the habit of blogging about them).

Here's the biggest change:

Our storytime is now an official part of the library's offerings (rather than a word-of-mouth gathering), which, don't get me wrong, is exciting and empowering--but this also means we're seeing new faces, most of whom don't actually speak French!  After a couple of sessions where Griffin was the only one answering my questions and singing the songs, where I had to revise my "lesson plan" on the fly since none of the other children would understand much of the stories, I have realized that I need to simplify, simplify, simplify, and also make sure to alternate every book with a physical activity to keep the kids from getting bored.

Typically, librarians interact with the children at storytimes by asking questions about the books, asking kids questions about themselves, encouraging them to join in by reciting words or phrases that are repeated in the books, or by making the appropriate animal sounds and vehicle noises, or by filling in the rhyming words at the end of sentences.

I'm discovering, though, that this sort of interaction between the reader and the listeners requires that the listeners be able to follow the story, and if most of the listeners and their parents don't understand French, then they give me blank stares instead of "cocorico"s and "vroum"s!

So now, the books are short, the puppets numerous, and we get up and dance to French songs instead of singing them ourselves!

a typical French storytime (2011)

I'm also doing my very best not to take it personally that few of our regulars come any more.  As children grow up, the older siblings get bored at storytime, so the families plan other activities that everyone can enjoy.  As new babies join the families, their nap routines become paramount--and their afternoon naps tend to fall right in the middle of storytime.  As children start attending school, the parents have to work around the school and bus schedule, which makes it hard for some to get to storytime on time, especially if they're coming from Boulder (20+ minute drive).

So yes, things change, which is what's supposed to happen, yes.  But I do miss my friends who moved away; I miss being able to attend French storytime--watching and listening and learning and holding my children on my lap--instead of leading it all the time.

my favorite kind of storytime

I can't do this.

I can't do it.  I can't do it all.  Not only can I not do it all, I can't even manage "most."

Some, yes.  On good days, I can do "some."  On good days, I get a shower and we all eat fruit or vegetables at every meal and the kids wear cute, clean clothes and the bed is made and the hail of crumbs and pools of milk around the high chair have been banished.  I answer emails, jot down notes about what brilliant things Griffin says and what new things Gwyneth can reach, play board games with him, play peek-a-boo with her, read to them both.

On good days, my husband and I make each other laugh, compliment each other, and talk about stuff besides "where-do-we-have-to-be-when-and-what-errands-can-we-do-on-the-way-home-if-neither-kid-has-a-meltdown" and Gwyneth's bowel movements and Griffin's birthday party.

On good days, I don't have to wake her up from her nap to go pick up him at preschool--oh, I hate having to do that!--and I don't have to leave the library early to take him to music class, where I fret about how I'm going to get all my work done when I can't even squeeze in 15 hours a week at my job.

On good days Gwyneth sleeps till 5:00 am instead of waking up at 2:00am or 4:00am or both, and Griffin doesn't wet the bed.

On good days, we're not in such a rush that I have to drive Griffin to school, meaning that I can accomplish 30-60 minutes of exercise by walking him back and forth.  (It goes without saying that on good days, it's not snowing or broiling in the upper 90s.)

Notice that even on "good days," I don't usually make time for writing.  I don't visit other people's blogs any more, and forget about Facebook and Pinterest and Words with Friends and practicing my French by reading online--not gonna happen most days.  I don't record those scrawled notes from so many post-its and envelope backs into Griffin's scrapbook or Gwyneth's baby book.  (Full disclosure: she is 18 months old.  Her baby book has nothing written in it.  And Griffin's scrapbook was last updated in--wait for it--January 2009.)

I hardly ever read novels any more.  Or cook from scratch.  Or grow more than tomatoes in what used to be a verdant vegetable garden.  Or exercise vigorously enough to work up a sweat.  Or leave work thinking, "Great!  Now I'm all caught up!"

Thinking about all the projects I never finish (or start) and the obligations that I neglect depresses me.  I disappoint myself on a regular basis.

Even on a good day, I have one or two children with me nearly every moment that I'm not at work.  Right now, I'm typing this blog post while my sister-in-law watches my little rascals for two hours; next week, I'll take my turn with her two kids.  That makes two hours of alert alone time twice a month that I can count on. (Unless blearily clipping coupons or folding laundry after the kids have fallen asleep counts as alone time?)  No wonder I'm not blogging much any more.  And I'm really sorry that I haven't kept up with all of your inspiring, funny, thought-provoking, fascinating blogs!

But I remind myself that overall, even the exhausting and unproductive days are still good days, because Ed and I have each other and two healthy children and supportive family and friends.  I don't have to work 40+ hours a week while paid caregivers get to watch my kids grow up.   I remind myself that at this point, 18-month-old Gwyneth is at the apex of neediness: like an infant, she can't feed herself, use the toilet, or articulate clearly what she wants, but unlike an infant, she is always in motion and needs constant supervision.  She will slowly get more autonomous; she will eventually sleep through the night.  And starting in August, Griffin will be in school from 8:00 am till 2:30 pm instead of just 11:45 till 2:30.  Dare I hope that these schedule changes will allow for more alone time and more Ed-and-Sarah time and more work time?

And I also remind myself that on all days, good and bad, I still speak French, and only French, with my beautiful children.  I can't do it all--but at least I can do this.

multitasking maman

le blog de Jean-Paul Sartre

http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/shouts/2012/10/le-blog-de-jean-paul-sartre.html

Word.